Tinsley is waiting for Carole at a little restaurant-Carole is really liking Tinsley so far. Tinsley reports that her mom and friend are coming to help her apartment hunt. Carole and Tinsley both attended the Winter Wonderland Ball at the NY Botanical Gardens (Carole slayed) a few weeks ago and Carole reads Tinsley a gossip blurb about her, that also mentioned Carole, from the NY Post. Tinsley is overwhelmed being back in NYC because of her past. Carole suggests reinvention, like cutting or coloring her hair but Tinsley gets panic stricken at the mere thought of not being blond, or not having her curls. Girl. Carole does have a point but Tinsley is not having it.
Sonja is having lunch served by Frenchy. He’s moved in and is extra. Frenchy predicts that they’ll be very happy and thinks Sonja should shut the door when she’s pooping. Sonja thinks he shouldn’t even be on the same floor if she’s going and should ask permission before climbing the stairs. She is cray. Sonja doesn’t think Tinsley should be in such a rush to leave. Now Sonja and Frenchy are chatting in bed about those “beechez” and how their relationship is no ones business. He mentions a text he got from a friend about Sonja and Rocco. Sonja lies.
Ramona Facetimes Avery to tell her the kitchen is finished. She wants to have a cocktail party to celebrate the completion of her renovations and is inviting Bethenny. She feels bad, wants to make amends and really has no idea how things got this far. Really?
Tinsley and her mother Dale are meeting with Chris, the friend/realtor to apt hunt. He tells her they’re in the “primest” neighborhood in the West Village. They look at a 4 bedroom ridiculously priced apartment with a tee-tiny master bedroom. It’s pretty, but for almost 9k a month? Tinsley says she can afford it but wants to keep looking.
Carole is having her interior designer over to finally refurbish the couch she inherited from her mother in law. It’s old, classic, has a lot of history but is beat to hell. She’s been collecting fabric swatches and the designer is like whoa. There’s a lot. There’s also a cat hanging from the curtains. Adam shows up bearing flowers and is picking up the last of his things. Carole is relieved for the space and knows their relationship will get much better. She wants his Buddha head though, and is willing to trade him-he wants her lamps. The designer says no way-Carole says they’ll talk later.
Back to the apt hunt with Tinsley and co-they look at another 9k apt but this one is WAY nicer and she’s dumb if she doesn’t take it. Tinsley hems and haws, she’s not sure if she’s “mature” enough for an apt and the responsibilities (wait what?) and starts to go in panic mode about renting. She’s kind of overthinking this and being a baby. Shit happens-she’s 39 or so? I kind of get it but come ON.
Bethenny has Fredrick over to declutter and simplify her apt for sale. He wants the bar out-she doesn’t think it can be moved. She did some furniture moving and Fredrick is happy with everything but the bar. Bethenny makes a call and finds out it’ll probably break if they try and move it, which Fredrick is fine with. Bethenny is not. She spent 40k in it (for WHAT?) and doesn’t want to break it.
Carole is packing for the D.C. women’s march. She and Dorinda are going together.
Sonja is in Hoboken NJ to meet Rocco for dinner-sort of out of the way, no? They’re so happy to see each other. Does he own this place? The restaurant is shut down just for them. She’s got to tell Rocco about Frenchy. She starts off telling him the Tom saga, and Rocco says some guys think the way Tom behaved is normal. Sonja says she doesn’t like it, she wants “normalty”. Now she’s got to explain Frenchy and is stumbling over her words, doing it very poorly. Said he’s a complete stranger she slept with and now he’s moved in and she doesn’t know how it happened (basically, that’s what I got anyway). What a liarface. She tells Rocco that there’s no other guy like him though. Lies. Rocco wants to know the status of their relationship.
In DC, Carole, Dorinda and Hannah are marching. Some of the chants are funny. There are so many people, they have an amazing day.
Ramona is prepping for her cocktail party to show off her apartment. Her hair looks awful and weird, in a tight high ponytail but it’s too severe and her ponytail hair is fried. Carole is the first to arrive and noticed Ramona’s weird hair. Tinsley and her mom arrive, she introduces Ramona to her mom-you can definitely see the 2 eyeing and sizing up each other. Dale comments in Ramona’s pony. Ramona thinks her pony is edgy. It’s not.
Tinsley is rehashing her apartment hunting drama to Carole and complaining about how overwhelming it is. Waaah. Dorinda walks in-I think she should trash a room. She’s too classy for that. I’m not. Oh look-Harry Dubin. I feel like when he’s on the show he tries extra hard to be schmexy and he just comes off as smarmy and gross. He says hello to Tinsley, she introduces him to her mom. Harry is openly staring at Tinsley’s chest, compliments her cross necklace then comments on her chest. Tinsley is grossed out. She drags her mom away, calling Harry an asshole, but he follows them because he’s gross and persistent.
Sonja’s here! Ramona calls her Sony. Sonja turns the corner and hears “hello, Sonja” in a Hannibal Lector-y voice but it’s Harry. Of course. She’s like really? Harry?
Harry like Sonja’s red lipstick. She tells him she’s turned over a new leaf, and he wants to see it. Ugh. Tom and Luann stroll in. Luann actually tears herself away from Tom’s side long enough to sit with Dorinda and Carole. She asks if Bethenny is coming-no way. She was invited but declined. Ramona and Bethenny still are not speaking.
Now Ramona has joined them and Dorinda asks what they have to do to get Bethenny and Ramona back together-Carole recommends a text and meeting in private. Ramona gets defensive and says that it wasn’t all her, why is she getting all the blame? Carole explains that Ramona went to unnecessary lengths to insult Bethenny, but Ramona says “hey, I was attacked!”. That didn’t happen but ok. Ramona says she doesn’t even remember what she said and blames the fact she was drinking on Bethenny-Ramona was “nervous”. Ramona says she really loves Bethenny and wants to reach out and make amends.
More Harry, yuck. A woman named Missy walks in, she used to date Tom. Harry orders her to “come here!”, she scoots away. Missy gets introduced to Luann, Tom is a bit red in the face-and he reminds the ladies they met once before at the Regency.
Tom and Missy awkwardly conversate-like, they’re talking without trying to look like they’re talking-she comments on his wedding ring and Tom compares it to being a dog with a collar. Excellent. Great pick, Luann. Lu whispers to Tom asking if that’s the woman from the Regency, she’s got that fake nervous smile plastered on her face-he says “it’s Missy”. Lu prods a bit more and he admits they dated. She’s still wearing the fake, forced, nervous smile and is totally crowding him. I’m waiting for her to lift her leg and mark her territory. I don’t buy for one SECOND that she’s secure in all this.
Harry is now honing in on Missy. He’s trying to get the details of the Regency hookup with Tim in the bathroom (that place needs a serious bleaching) but she’s not going there. Lu and her freaky forced smile scare her, and she doesn’t need that mess coming for her. Harry tells her that she’s the full package, and she says “you snooze, you lose”. I think Lu did her a favor. If I owned or managed the Regency I’d be pissed-the image Tom gives it isn’t a good one-a sleazy, skeezy pick up/cheating bar where middle aged bald men bang chicks in the bathroom. Not a good look. For either. It’s Toms personal bachelor pad. He’s gross too. Anyway-
Dorinda is doing the robot dance in the corner. Sonja thinks that Ramona invited Missy on purpose, starting drama.
Next week: Bethenny plans a Vermont trip. Tinsley can’t sleep. Sonja offends Luann. Tinsley melts down.
Talk soon Lovelies
-Allie
