RHONY Recap: Wishful Invitation

This weeks episode starts with some quick clips of various housewives with their pets. Tinsley is picking up poop, Carole babies her Babys, etc.

Bethenny is at a restaurant waiting for Sonja who is late despite living literally right around the corner. Sonja’s reason is that she was early so went for a manicure. The waiter gives Bethenny a blank menu accidentally and she and Sonja both have a laugh. Sonja says she’s still purging her house and her mind, and it’s going well. Bethenny asks how Ramona’s surprise party went. Sonja reports that it was “so very nice, lots of food, so very nice”. She mentions how nice Dorinda is being to her. Sonja tells Bethenny about the conversation she had with Ramona out on the balcony, and says that Ramona is incapable of an emotionally mature conversation and won’t admit wrongdoing. Holy insight, Sonja-not drinking is doing her brain function good. Sonja tells Bethenny that she completely understands why Bethenny was upset. Bethenny says that Ramona didn’t care about Brynn, she was just trying to shame Bethenny. Sonja says how Ramona is dating a lot of random guys, then complains how all of the girls date “her men” and lists men she and the other women have dated: Harry, Pirate, Tom. Bethenny calls her a “curator of cock”.

Dorinda is in the Berkshires to have a memorial service for Richard, it’s the 5 year anniversary of his passing. She’s at the cemetery with her family-she says she didn’t invite John because the people there are the family that was, and he understands. Except that Carole is there. Laryngitis and all. Dorinda introduces her to her family-Richard’s 2 oldest children aren’t there though. Hannah reads some words she wrote about Richard while she was doing her contour. She says how devastating it was to lose him and that he made her who she is today. Dorinda is impressed, and says something as well-she still loves him and misses him every day. Everyone says their goodbyes and heads back to Dorinda’s for lunch.

Bethenny is sitting and organizing Brynn’s room. She thinks Brynn may be a glittery girly hoarder. She’s looking for a space for all of Brynn’s American Girl dolls, she’s thinking of buying a bigger apartment. Not for the dolls, just in general.

At Dorinda’s the family has gathered for a post memorial lunch. Carole is chatting with Dorinda’s parents who have been married for 57 years. Hannah tells a story about Richard-when she was young she said she was going to the bodega for a pack of gum and Richard gave her 100$ bill. They all laugh and say that’s typical Richard-always giving his money away. Homeless people used to wait for him outside of church and the deli because they knew he’d be throwing cash around. Dorinda said she had to give him a “fake ATM card” or else he’d give everything away. He was generous. Got it. Dorinda then gives Carole a tour of the property.

Sonja is giving Tinsley kitchen rules. Tinsley is so over this-she’s really not sure what the rules are. Sonja thinks that Tinsley is “clueless” about things because she grew up with hired help. Tinsley doesn’t want to wear out her welcome and feels like it might be time to move out. Sonja has brown ice in her freezer-eww-and says it used to be yellow til Tinsley moved in. Apparently Sonja blames everything on Tinsley. They start throwing ice at each other playfully-ice fight!

Lu is having Dorinda and the rest of her bridal party get together to try on their wedding attire. Lu hasn’t ever worn a wedding dress and she says she’s got a right to. I agree-let her wear whatever she feels beautiful in. Out Lu comes in her wedding gown-it’s simple, classy, and pretty. She looks so happy and glowy. Dorinda tries her bridesmaid dress on-it’s a blush pink and very flattering. Lu’s got her sisters there as well as the dress designer.

Tinsley is walking with her friend and her friends dog-the dog is on a remote control power wheels jeep type thing because it’s obviously cooler than pushing the dog in a stroller. Duh. The jeep keeps crashing. Tinsley tells her friend (who’s name I didn’t get, but I don’t care because she was so extra and trying way too hard)that she needs to find an apartment like, now. Friend goes on a tangent against the Upper East Side like it’s a 3rd world country. She has Tinsley drive the dog. This scene is so dumb.

Bethenny is hanging out at Carole’s and the shredded couch is even worse. Lawdy. Carole covers it and Bethenny asks how Thanksgiving was-Carole and Adam were on each other’s nerves so they really need space and separate apartments. She’s been encouraging Adam to find his own place. It’s kind of like they’re having a 2 year itch. Bethenny had a stressful holiday-Carole asks about the Jason situation. Bethenny says she’s tired but has got to deal with it. Things are escalating-Carole says she’s witnessed some beyond bizarre behavior on his end and she’s concerned. Dorinda is trying to get everyone together for drinks-Bethenny is in.

Ramona is alone in her apartment singing “I had a birthday, I had a party” and tells her dog it can’t come with her to Vegas. She calls Dorinda to thank her for throwing her the surprise party. Ramona doesn’t understand why Bethenny didn’t show up. She says Bethenny isn’t a true friend and that it’s sad Bethenny didn’t call or drop by.

Bethenny tells Carole that she’s got zero to say regarding the Ramona situation. Carole says that Ramona knows Bethenny was upset with her. Bethenny just wants Ramona to leave her alone.

Dorinda’s get together is happening-she and Luann meet up with Carole who’s already ordered food. Ramona knows that Bethenny will be there and she plans on using a less confrontational approach with her. Lu is glad that the tension with her and Carole is gone. Bethenny arrives and is in a good mood. Dorinda is talking about Luann’s wedding and how she tried on her bridesmaid dress but no one took pics. Ramona starts messing with Luann over not being invited to her wedding in typical selfish, mannerless rude Ramona style. She’s going on and on asking where her invitation is and why wasn’t she sent one even though she wasn’t going to go. Bethenny calls it a mind game-“I don’t want to go but I want you to invite me”, says it’s manipulative and childish (which it is). But Rudemona isn’t done, no-she tells Lu that people are still placing bets on whether the wedding will happen or not. She claims that people are calling her asking if they should go through with their
travel plans for the wedding. Luann has no words, Bethenny tells Ramona that she’s not being nice. Bethenny says Ramona is an asshole, and that was an asshole thing to say. Truth. Ramona then toasts to the wedding and tells Lu how happy she is for her.

Tinsley and Sonja arrive and Sonja immediately makes things weird by announcing that she isn’t with Tinsley and Tinsley is on her own with her own friends. She passive aggressively says she doesn’t want to be a tag along. Carole asks Tinsley if she plans in staying in NYC which she is, and asks how it is living with Sonja. Tinsley diplomatically says good, but they had a little fight that morning. Carole reveals that the reason she’s asking is because she’s on the board at her apartment building and there are 2 empty apartments.Tinsley’ eyes light up and she’s very interested. Sonja, Luann, Ramona and Dorinda are in a group by the bar, when Sonja lets out a silent but deadly fart. Wait what? I guess that’s a thing she does.

Carole is showing cat videos that Adam took of Baby. Tinsley said she tattooed her pets name on her wrist-Carole says at least it wasn’t her husband’s name! Tinsley says that oh, she did that too-his initials are on her hip. Carole asks about Tinsley’s history with Topper-they were high school sweethearts that eloped because Andrea on 90210 did, but they had it annulled and got really married years later.

Ramona is off with Luann shit talking Bethenny-Ramona still doesn’t get it and asks “what did I do?”-she really has zero insight. She calls Bethenny a loose cannon. Luann makes her exit to go meet Tom. Bethenny says she’s going to leave, but Ramona slides into the seat next to her.

Ramona tries this weird, lecture-y, talking down to Bethenny approach, it’s not working. She’s talking to Bethenny like Bethenny is really slow-I’m not even sure what she’s trying to say-something about being concerned friends. Bethenny tells Ramona she doesn’t like the way Rudemona is speaking to her, Ramona doesn’t know what that means, so Bethenny elaborates and says she doesn’t want to be schooled by Ramona and doesn’t like the way she’s being spoken to. Ramona starts with the eyes closed while speaking crap and says “you’re really weird”. Ramona continues to defend her shaming Bethenny by saying she spoke to her out of concern (bullshit, already) and says she was SHOCKED-Bethenny says she’s just gonna go now but Ramona keeps going. Bethenny tells Ramona that she is not very self aware (truth) and Ramona says “waaaaoooooowwwwwww”. Ramona won’t let it go and is practically holding Bethenny hostage by not moving so Bethenny can get up. Bethenny is actually being very patient and polite, Ramona looks crazy. She continues to berate Bethenny who has finally had it, gets up and squeezes by Ramona to leave. Ramona stands up and caws like a crow to Bethenny’s back-she’s got to be off her meds.

Ramona sits down next to Carole and starts rubbing her face on Carole’s saying in a sing song voice “I don’t talk well! I have a bad way of talking!” and Carole is just like-help. Ramona starts badmouthing Bethenny and Carole tries to shut it down. Rudemona keeps going, says that Bethenny is like a wild dog-Tinsley sticks up for Bethenny and tells Ramona “um, so are you!” Ramona goes on to heap praise on herself and how she’s got no stinger. She’s got a huge heart, she’s the most amazing friend, and goes on to take a poll over whether or not she’s got the biggest heart in the world. Tinsley is forced into agreeing-everyone bails. Dorinda thinks something is up with Ramona. Ya think?

Next week: Bethenny has had it with Ramona, Avery gives a close-eyed Ramona advice on awkwardness, Tinsley makes out, we meet Dennis, Carole climbs the walls.

Talk soon, Lovelies

-Allie