RHONY Recap: A New Low

I’m back with the recaps!! Didja miss me?

Sonja and her new pet Tinsley are babbling about their Louis Vuitton bags, it’s making my eyes cross.

Luann is back at her Hamptons house and boy, did she miss it. She’s showing Dorinda around and the highlight of the tour is her creepy toilet with a self-lifting lid, and it washes you back and front. Um-Noe.

Bethenny and Carole are at Bethenny’s Hamptons house-apparently Sonja is frantically texting Bethenny with nastiness about Dorinda and Luann. Carole and Bethenny can’t believe that Sonja isn’t over The Great Un-Invite, and neither can anyone else.

In NYC, Sonja is shit-talking Luann to Tinsley yet still manages to boast about herself in the midst of shit-talking: that’s a feat. This must be the season of Sonja not getting over anything. Tinsley offers a sage nugget saying if Sonja and Luann want to salvage their friendship, Sonja HAS to drop the Tom thing. For real.

Back at Luann’s, Lu offers her daughter Victoria some wine, making sure to slip in that she’s almost 22. This is the DWI daughter, incidentally. Bet someone in NY is cringing. Lu is going over Sonja’s mad hatter party for Dorinda and Victoria’s benefit-Dorinda makes it a point to show how little she cares that she wasn’t invited by faking tears and distress. Lu reports that Sonja has a new roommate/houseguest/pet named Tinsley Mortimer. Dorinda says “yeah, I’ve heard of her” then asks if she’ll be interning. Lu hopes that she left some good wedding karma in the spare bedroom-maybe Tinsley will find a Prince like Tom! I hope not. Dorinda questions Sonja’s alleged sobriety and shows photos of Sonja in less than ladylike positions from Lu’s bridal shower. You know-strippers humping her on the floor doggy style-as one dies at a bridal shower. Dorinda thinks that Sonja is jealous of Dorinda’s contentment, relationship, and stability. Nope! She’s made you stole Tom from her and gave him to Lu, dummy!! GOD! Lu warns Dorinda that Sonja will most likely be at Ramona’s dinner, but Dorinda’s plan is to kill her with kindness.

Back to Sonja and Tinsley-Sonja says she’s not nervous about seeing Dorinda. In fact, she plans on saying hello, even. She’s now regretting excluding Dorinda from the mad hatter party. She doesn’t want to be “that” person. Too late!

Tinsley is at a loss as to what to pack for the weekend. Sonja wants to give away lingerie-undies, specifically. Hey-Erika?! But EW?!? What?!! I don’t care if they’re Dior. They are used, ugly as hell granny panties. And USED. Tinsley throws them to the ground. Now Sonja wants to see Tinsley’s underwear.

Carole is suffering from election stress, and Bethenny is talking dinner plans. She goes over the guest list and sneaks Lu’s name in. Carole is having an election party-she had invited Ramona but that’s up in the air right now. Bethenny tells Carole she needs to relax. A day drink, perhaps.

Lu, Dorinda and Victori are off on a boat ride driven by Lu. Luann says that people “love” calling her the Countess (no where near as much as she does) and once a Countess, always a Countess. Man, these Connecticut women get so pretentious. Sonja’s arrival is the next topic of discussion and Dorinda asks Luann to stick by her just in case Sonja acts up. Lu reassures her that she always defends her houseguests. Ohhhkay. Friends- maybe. Houseguests-always.

Bethenny and Carole are at an acupuncture appointment. Bethenny is really surprised at how stressed out Carole is and asks why she just doesn’t go to work for Hillary. Bethenny is loving those needles sticking in her skin but Carole is nervous. This Dr can tell from her tongue that her liver or some organ isn’t happy. Carole wants to know what the toe fungus she has means. Perhaps that you need an antifungal? Just a guess. This Dr has no answer. Adam now knows she has toe fungus. Carole is empathetic to Bethenny because she knows that she is still having issues with Jason. Bethenny says that having the divorce and apartment resolved helps and she’s managing her stress with cupping and acupuncture. Whatever gets you through. Bethenny is sort of dreading seeing Luann and wonders if she will bring up the Florida thing. Carole doesn’t think so. Bethenny says they have got to get to the restaurant first so that she and Carole can sit next to each other.

Dinner time! Carole and Bethenny do arrive first. The owner greets them and Carole thought he looked like Ramona’s “fake business” partner (and Sonja’s current) but they aren’t the same person. This guy is legit. Ramona arrives and says her hellos. She just got back from a function at Avery’s college and is VERY proud of the fact that the kids see her as a peer and not someone’s mother. She shows Carole and Bethenny pics-and right away I can tell Ramona has a huge chip on her shoulder with Bethenny and an agenda. Bethenny didn’t compliment her fast enough so she got an edge with Bethenny, and so it begins.

Next to join are Dorinda and Lu. Dorinda is anxious about it because she hasn’t seen Bethenny since early summer. Dorinda and Carole are talking election, Bethenny asks Lu about the addition on her house and Luann says it’s coming along, then invites them all to a late breakfast to see the progress. Ramona starts to say why she may not go to Carole’s election party-Dorinda says if Trump wins she will tell Hannah to start stripping. Bethenny tells Ramona that Carole doesn’t want uninformed people at her party-Ramona rolls her eyes and says she is very informed. She reads articles! She has a stack like this! She says everyone interprets things differently and Bethenny agrees. Ramona says she would like to stop in at the party, she’ll see.

Now Ramona is moving in for the kill. She asks Bethenny how old Brynn is now and does she go to private school (6 and no) then slides in to someone showing Avery an article about nude photos Alex McCord posed for and an elementary school aged Avery called Ramona “appalled”. Bethenny is confused as to where Ramona is going with this-then the shade comes down with Ramona causally wondering if anyone has approached 6 year old Brynn about Bethenny’s “soft porn” past. Ramona is so judgemental. Lu is confused as well, Dorinda is horrified. Ramona brings up the 2 dogs Bethenny got and had the nerve to not notify her about-Bethany is incredulous. Ramona looks so stupid right now. She’s hammering at Bethenny but Bethenny is handling it pretty well. Better than I would have. I’d have bitchslapped Ramona with a French fry by now. Bethenny says she doesn’t regret it-she wanted to be an actress, she needed the money, and she laughs about it now, but Ramona is trying super hard to shame her and getting frustrated because it’s not working. Now Ramona feels attacked-because Bethenny isn’t upset? Ramona is so extra. So a defeated Ramona tries a new approach in talking to Lu about Bethenny right in front of Bethenny. She keeps doing that weird thing that I hate, and that’s talking with her eyes closed-another weird Ramona affect. Dorinda tells Bethenny to not even acknowledge it.

Lu and Ramona continue to talk about Bethenny like she’s not sitting right across from them. Finally she’s like “um, hello, right here, I hear you” and still incredulous. The 3 of them start a stupid back and forth about etiquette and who was talking to who (whom?-now the Countess is getting involved and nasty. Ramona is giving Bethenny some weird facial expression (runway, anyone?) and Bethenny asks what it’s about, Halloween? Ramona has decided that Bethenny’s attitude is unacceptable and she doesn’t like it. She claims she was just trying to make conversation about what was going on in Bethenny’s life. Oh-is that what that was? Dorinda is sweaty and no longer hungry. She thinks Ramona’s delivery sucks. Ramona is really off-what is wrong with her? She calls Bethenny stupid, then Luann jumps in. Bethenny says she doesn’t care what they think of her, Luann says “you only care about yourself”. I just feel like it was an unfair gang-up and sneak attack. I know the Bethenny haters will love it-but to come for her via her daughter is slimy, even for Ramona. Luann is bent because Bethenny never asks about her wedding plans. Hint:she thinks you’re marrying a cheater, and odds are if Bethenny asked Luann the status of her wedding plans, Luann would bring up Florida. It’s a no win. Bethenny has had it, she’s leaving. Lu mocks her for leaving and said how she stayed in the Berkshires (she did storm outside, but whatevs).

Sonja and Tinsley have arrived at Sonja’s friends Hamptons house. They’ve both got a ton of luggage-Tinsley’s room is on the first floor right outside the front door. Her room is cute-small, but cute and she says it’s “chic” about 8 times. Sonja humps the bed to show it doesn’t squeak.

Ramona is at a winery meeting Dorinda and Luann for lunch. Ramona gives a very sanitized version that favors her of the previous night’s happenings. Dorinda joins in on the Bethenny bashing, which is a different tune from the night before.

Bethenny is obviously not going to Ramona’s dinner party. She has a gift for her but Carole can deliver it since she’s still going.

Luann is complaining that Dorinda woke her up at 7am-but that was because Dorinda got woken up at 7am with info on all the nastiness Sonja has been spewing on Facebook. Dorinda isn’t having it-she’s going to see Sonja tonight and it’s ON.

Sober Sonja with a glass of wine tells Tinsley that Dorinda is fine, she just did one bad by “excising me from the group”. Tinsley is nervous to meet Dorinda. Sonja says she’s movec on (since when?) and it’ll be good to clear the air tonite. (Phil Collins “In the Air Tonite” drums playing).

Ramona is prepping for her dinner party.Guests are arriving, including her friend Nancy, who has had a bad run in with a drunk plastic surgeon, it looks like. Yowsa. Dorinda is showing Ramona more Sonja crap that’s been unearthed.

Dorinda lets Ramona know that Bethenny is sitting this one out. Carole is already there, Sonja sits with her and lets her know that Sonja has it coming. She tells Carole that one of Richard’s friends is a mole and sends her all sorts of info, she’s got a file this thick. Carole is all-FBI??! Dorinda says noooooo.
Carole is intrigued. Dorinda plans on staying sober to “stalk her prey”.

As Sonja’s car pulls up to Ramona’s she’s still bitching to Tinsley about not being invited to stay there. Ohhh Sonja. That’s the least of your problems tonite.

Next week: Dinner is served. It’s the beginning of the end? Bethenny is a peeper. Dorinda hors in. Tinsley goes out….behind Sonja’s back.

Talk soon, Lovelies

-Allie

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46 thoughts on “RHONY Recap: A New Low

  1. Great recap!
    I watched the show and I read your recap. 🙂 I pretty much agree with all you’ve said but Bethenny deserves any crap the women toss to her, even dumb silly Ramona’s bs.
    Ramona is delusional. Bethenny is cruel. No match.
    Next week should be a crowd pleaser!

    Liked by 4 people

      • But I think that Dorinda and Sonja will settle their beef eventually. Dorinda will go in for the kill but I can’t see Sonja giving it back to her. Sonja will appear to be the victim in this. Dorinda is tough. Sonja is more silly. Sonja does seriously need to forget Tom. It should be a good show.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Loved your recap! Sonja drives me nuts!! I agree with izmeagain, Ramona is delusional. I too am waiting on Dorinda to let loose!! Can’t wait till next episode.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Yes Allie, spot on with the recap and I do agree with izmeagain. Bitchenny has been so cruel to everyone and now she’s going in on Carol. She could use a reality check. I’m enjoying New York so far. Better than BH and I’m very loyal to BH but the pantygate was ridiculous. 💋

    Liked by 4 people

    • Thank you!! I just can’t hate Bethenny. I feel like what you see is what you get, you know where she stands-she’s blunt, yes, sometimes abrasive. But she’s in your face about it and not snakey like Ramona and Luann. I used to love Luann. No more. And Ramona looks like her attitude-shit.

      Liked by 4 people

      • I’m not a Bethenney fan, I’m consistent with the way I lose love, her offense? Slut shaming, and refusing to apologize for it. That said, Ramona was shaming her too, which I can’t get down with either. We need more progressive casts

        Like

      • Allie, I agree about Bethenny. At times I’m over her arrogance and rudeness but respect her directness. It truly is all about her, however. She needs to lay off Carole- what the hell is more important than the election and its impact? I remember the days leading up to the election and how I felt waking up to the disaster on Nov. 9th and totally understand Carole’s feeling of malaise.
        Oh, Ramona. No words for your outrageous behavior. Is there anything more depressing than a middle aged woman who can’t accept the fact that you are just that? Poor Avery.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I agree about her being so dismissive about something that was clearly super important to Carole. Are we going to have to relive this awful election in the show? Gawd I hope not. Once was more than enough.

        Like

  4. I’m another one who just can’t hate Bethenny. The second that crazy bitch Ramona and the whore Luann would have brought up my kid, and told me how embarrassed I should be – it would be on. Not only was Victoria thrown out of her fancy school for her behavior, Ramona’s kid, who she thinks is a saint was also in danger of being asked to leave her school. The administrators were none too happy with her calling her mom and her friend “lezzies” on one of the first episodes. I try not to take these shows too seriously, I mean they are just people on my tv screen, they have no impact on my life at all….but I just cannot stand Luann. She bugs the shit out of me, and Ramona definitely has something wrong with her. I think Bethenny showed incredible restraint, I would have been over that table with a hand on each one of their throats.
    I don’t believe in being my kid’s friend. I am extremely close to both of my kids, we do things together and have a lot of fun. But make no mistake, I am the mom. I’m not a friend.
    I wonder what the deal is with Dorinda and money….when she made a smart ass comment about Bethenny last year, it pissed B off and she said that she donated liquor to her premiere party because Dorinda couldn’t afford it….then Dordina said Sonja is making comments about her finances. She seems to live a pretty good life….is she another one who is all smoke and mirrors??

    Liked by 4 people

    • Ugh thank you! I was getting lonely over here on the I can’t hate Bethenny bench! It’s funny, there are memes all over comparing Ramona to the mom on Mean Girls-ha! The way Ramona threw Brynn in to it and acted like she was just being a friend was as underhanded, backhanded and gross as Ramona could be. I hate her affect, closing her eyes when she talks to people WHAT IS THAT? And since Luann has hooked up with sleazy Tom she’s become insufferable. Victoria also joined the Dewey club, don’t forget, perfect little peach. ::barf:: Bethenny showed so much restraint-i would have lost my shit on those 2 smug fake as hell bitches. That’s interesting about Dorinda-wonder what’s up?

      Liked by 5 people

    • Ramona is one crazy spaced out cadet. She had no business egging Bethenny on and bringing Bryn into the situation. But, Bethenny needs to check her attitude. She does not care one bit for any of those women. They are all disposable to her. She is one cold hearted woman.

      Like

      • See-I don’t see her as cold-hearted at all. I think she’s not very trusting, and I can’t blame her, some women will turn on you in a flash. Especially with Luann making toasts to “take Bethenny down”. I’d be guarded too.

        Like

  5. OMG, I’ve only gotten through part of the recap. Ramona, in her 50’s thinks she is a peer to college age kids?! She is delusional! Ok back to finish.

    Liked by 4 people

  6. I LOVE that Carole gets digs in on Jason. He may have a gag order on Bethenny, but not Carole. They are actual friends off the show, not just cast mates like most of the women…so she see’s and hears all the shit that Jason pulls. He is a creepy dude, I never liked him and didn’t understand what Bethenny saw in him.

    Liked by 4 people

    • I do think Bethenney should have a gag order on Jason. It’s time to stop trashing the father of her child in public. I also think Caroline shouldn’t participate. You can be a real friend and really supportive without saying things in front of a camera that will ultimately hurt her daughter one day. They both can say what they want in private when Brynn isn’t around.

      Liked by 2 people

    • Amen. I don’t think he’s as innocent or bullied as he’s painted-I think he’s vicious, vindictive and a creep. That apartment-he parked his lame ass in it not because he wanted to be there, but to get under Bethenny’s skin and hurt her. He’s a douche.

      Like

  7. Ramona was ridiculous with Bethenney. Luanne wasn’t great either, but I’ll give her a pass because Bethenny was inexplicably cruel to her last season.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Ummm I know I am late to this thread as I just got a chance to watch this but did anyone else think Romanas nose looked different – it looked crooked to me but maybe I just never noticed it .

    I mean she is I think close to 60 and she looks fab but I could not keep from staring at it

    Liked by 1 person

  9. The only thing I’ve learned new since catching up on this season, is that they are all still crazy bitchez, and that I don’t ever want to be “cupped.” Ever.

    Liked by 1 person

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